“you are a star, therefore you are happy”

Upon reflection on today… there was a lot of thought towards what makes people happy, enthusiastic about things and people’s interests…

I had a day of Drama… in many respects, real or otherwise.

I started my morning with the anticipation of my first day back of uni. I was pretty anxious about getting there and I really didn’t want to be late – like usual. However with these things on my mind it was as though someone had decided that before the day had even begun that things wouldn’t be going smoothly…

I woke up feeling incredibly sick, I was nauseous and I had the feeling of being dehydrated, I thought that if I had my shower, I would come back downstairs feeling much better I could get dressed, eat some breakfast and be on my way. Well that wasn’t te case because I ended up feeling worse. I decided after getting dressed that the best thing to do was to go to the chemist to pick up something to stop feeling sick, then go to the milkbar to get some Gatorade – for the electrolytes… when I came home and had these things with some food, I did start to feel better… soon enough I was on my way and before you know I needed to go to the bathroom!!

Even though I was originally running on time I was now surely going to be late…urgh, one of my least favourite things is when I’m late to places! What followed was every piece of connecting public transport I had missed! Once I got to my final station and was running for the bus – the bus driver saw me and decided to keep driving so as I am the determined one… I decided to walk! But somehow managed to go a longer way than usual!! urgh urgh urgh… Another muggie day so I arrived at uni in a bit of a “mood”, sweaty and 35 mins late – really NOT good…

I soon realised that all they had managed to do was go through the unit guide and make introductions to each other – so basically I missed the most and my least favourite dreaded part of the class!! I didn’t have to say:

“Hi I’m Emma, I’m in 4th year, doing this subject cos I didn’t do it last year, etc, etc…” So thank goodness for that!

The part of class that I had arrived to was a discussion on what we want our students to get out of teaching performance (Drama and Dance), the skills it takes for us to be a teacher… and always my favourite and usually most heated…

Why is Drama considered Fun, a bludge, not as hard as other subjects, get scaled down during VCE and all that stuff that I just lovveeeee talking about…

I decided to contribute to this discussion with some of my teaching rounds experience of last year… this is roughly what I said:

When I was at *insert school here* I was able to observe a lot of different classes because the school was small, I had a lot of time and took the opportunity to do so. I was able to see pretty much every subject this school had to offer and therefore students studying different things… The one thing I picked up was an example of Performance VS Maths, the students who were in my class were all crazy about performance and were enthusiastically participating in that class – when they got to Maths they had no interest so they didn’t participate and didn’t perform as well. Then I got to observe a physics class with a different set of students but who were just as enthusiastic as the performance students except they were doing Physics – if these students had been in performance their enthusiasm for the subject would have completely dropped.

Basically you’re good at what you’re interested in because you’re interested in the work – therefore you will do well. Who is to say which subject is harder than another? Another clear example is looking at me and a friend of mine. We are very similar but also very different. I’m very arty/crafty whereas she is more sciency and she told me that if she had to have done an art folio in VCE – she would have most likely have failed because she wouldn’t even know where to begin.

This is why these systems put in place to grade students in order for them to complete year 12 – is B-U-L-L…

It then turned to fun drama activities where we looked at improvisation, we had a couple of fun games to start off the lesson, some group improv activities and then finishing off with an activity where we did mini performances after been given a stimulus – the class went quickly and everyone had fun and it took me back to so many theories about Drama etc… We all chose this subject to teach, therefore are enthusiastic and think these activities are fun… 😛

I travelled back home where I had a smooth run, a cup of tea, a gluten-free cookie and was off again to meet a friend…

We had dinner and then went to see “My week with Marilyn” and I must say that it was incredible!

Many questions could be asked after seeing that film… we could have continued my discussions that I had with my peers… what makes a good actress? what is considered acting? What are the boundaries when it comes to love and those you work for? continuing on – What is the appropriate age gap for lovers? What makes a good film/play? Should someone regardless of their star status still show up to work on time? There are pretty much endless possibilities…

What stuck with me though is the quote from the film which is also the title of this post – “You are a star, therefore you are happy” and just from this film alone – not based on any information – besides the woman herself is the only person who could really answer this question…

I don’t think she was happy… Being a star doesn’t automatically make you happy, does it? The film portrayed her as someone who lacked confidence, was always popping pills, as someone who was sexy, etc and then on the other side Someone who didn’t believe in herself and someone who went with the flow to please others. It really didn’t seem like she had any control over her life at all.

What is happy? How do you measure your happiness, if measurement is the way to do so? I think for myself that there have been many times that I have been happy and many times that I haven’t. When I have been both happy and not, different things have done it for me and can change instantly from one to the other. If you had asked me just over 18 months ago I was very sad because I had lost a dear friend of mine… and now I’ve learnt to live with and accept that loss and find things to be happy about. Sometimes also just because you might be in a crabby mood doesn’t mean that you aren’t still happy underneath.

I think though that sitting here today ultimately I am happy… why – well that’s because I have a lot to offer, for the first time in a long time I believe in myself, I have uni to go to, a job that pays the bills, family to support me even if they aren’t all well friends that are close, lovely house-mates that are problem solvers, a lovely house to live in, resilience that has been learnt and I’m living in, coping with the stressors from life as they come and knowing that even if overall a day can be bad there is still something good. So yes I am happy!

I may have wet and possibly ruined shoes thanks to the rain today… but happy nonetheless.

Lesson from today:

Drama/Dance/Theatre studies and performance can come in many packages… but when you look at what is there – you might be able to smile and accept the life you have because I’m sure it’s great, you just have to believe it.

SO – what makes you happy?

Signing off… sweet dreams! 🙂

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